Are Humans Meant To Be Monogamous?

Humans and Monogamy

In a world where the divorce cases are on the rise and marriage rates are slowly diminishing, you have to wonder what’s going on. Many factors show why the marriage-divorce ratio is now at 2 to 1 for more than ten years. Is it because of the increased level of population and finding the right partner is a hit or miss?

Is it because people are not satisfied with their personal lives and blame it on their relationship? It might be because humans aren’t meant to be monogamous. Let’s dive into the details:

Back in the day

In the past, there was no such thing as getting divorced, having multiple partners or losing your virginity before getting married. It did happen, but to a lesser extent than now. That is because people who did this were seen as either sinners or filthy people. They were branded as social outcasts aka pariahs.

Of course, there were some exceptions. Royal members, conquerors or people of the elite class divorced, banished, killed or changed their partner without having to deal with consequences. Search for Henry the VIII, Cleopatra, Nero and even to some extent, King Jong-un.

Even so, some social and religious rules made it clear for married couples that they can’t divorce or have multiple partners. These are called monogamous religions. Some religions are polygamous like Hinduism, Buddhism, Celtic paganism, Judaism, Islam and some branches of Christianity.

Most polygamous religions or states do have some regulations when it comes to having more than one wife. That’s right; most of them do favor men in having multiple wives and not vice versa. It’s called polyandry, and it’s as rare as you think.

Some religions believe that polygamy is something that has to do with tradition while other faiths believe that it is more of a social thing, so it isn’t a fundamental act. In any case, most of the modern world accepts only monogamy, socially and religiously.

What could drive a person to have multiple partners?

It could be boredom. Jokes aside, there are some financial benefits from having multiple partners. It is an advantageous thing if you use your partners to form a family. There are reality shows that present this kind of act. Of course, if you have multiple partners, you will also need to up your responsibility game.

You will also need to understand that each and every partner has a different personality, perspective and it can lead to personal and even social issues. Another thing to look out for is the fact that with so many partners, you can still encounter financial problems. You will need to organize what each and every individual need to do.

The more you look at a family that consists of multiple partners and members, the more you will see that it’s small society or even a business than a family.

Teenagers, media, new generations

In modern times, teens can get influenced by the media or even their surroundings (drugs, friends, family) that it’s acceptable to switch partners like socks or have multiple partners. This can happen way before reaching adulthood and can have so many repercussions on the teenager.

It can affect the way how the teenager views relationships, how he or she sees his or her partners. That teenager might never understand what a serious or long lasting relationship is.

The idea of a polygamous marriage

Humans, like animals, were believed to be monogamous, meaning that they will have to find the right partner and stick with that partner until they die. This is no longer the case because some may want to dump their partner for another one or go with two or more at the same time, without the partners knowing each other.

Some do it because they can help others because of their sexual fetishes or because they want to try something new. It may be something that has to do with people who didn’t experience their sexual desires before getting married.

Because of that, some marriages can get dull, and some people may find out that their partner can limit or refuse to have sex or even socially interact with their significant other. This is why some people cheat. Most of them claim that they do it for sex while others just want to feel loved.

Taking all this information, we can see that being in a monogamous relationship can be a positive thing or a bad one. Some people even abused can’t divorce because of the moral repercussions, social issues or because of their financial status.

The good news, sort of

Not all is bad. Some couples need some alone time or space to figure things out. Getting divorced for a minor issue can’t ruin your life. Also, it is important to do the test of time. Before committing, go a three or a five-year relationship. Want kids?

Don’t unzip it just yet; get a dog or a cat instead. This way you will understand the responsibilities of raising a child. Parental investment can make a monogamous couple survive more and give them a reason to stay together.

But what about those who don’t want to get married? What about those who are afraid of long term relationship or prefer to be free and interact with multiple partners? If you think that having this relation in your life is a right decision, then more power to you.

Some people can juggle with different partners without having to be emotionally invested. This happens mostly with people who have friends with benefits or live with them. It’s all about having fun and not getting too attached to each other. It can work, but it also needs a certain level of responsibility.

When it comes to humans, polygamous relations can be something interesting, but more experimentation and time is required. There are disadvantages on both sides, so it’s better to meditate on what type of relation you want in your life.


Scientists believe that monogamy is more of a social structure, meant for order and investment, but not necessarily because it’s natural.

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